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Understanding Mormon Guilt and Shame: Feminist Mormon Housewives Podcast

Understanding Mormon Guilt and Shame

Last summer I attended a week-long training based on the shame and vulnerability research or Brene’ Brown’s. When Lindsay asked me to record another fMh Podcast on shame and guilt in the Mormon I was elated. From my 20 years of clinical work with members of the LDS community, I’ve noticed that shame and guilt are often collapsed into the same experience. It’s helpful to understand the difference. Shame is I AM BAD, while guilt is MY BEHAVIOR WAS BAD. Guilt is toxic and never inspires people to change while guilt can prompt us to make changes. I hope you enjoy the podcast!

To my listen to my earlier FMH podcast about the importance of self-care during, click here.

Also, my book “The Burnout Cure; An Emotional Guide for Overwhelmed Women” expounds on these ideas.

Learn more about
Brene’ Brown’s shame research
Relational-Cultural Theory
Cultural Transformation Theory
Wasatch Family Therapy

 

How To Be More Assertive: Studio 5

How to be assertive

“Assertiveness” is a word that can have some negative connotations. Some might equate being assertive with being pushy, bossy, or controlling. But in reality, assertiveness is a communication skill that can help us express our feelings and needs and ultimately grow closer in our relationships. The truth is that assertiveness is extremely important in having the life we want. Here are some strategies to help you be more assertive:

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What To Do When You Don’t Like Your Child’s Friends: LDS Living Magazine Interview

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Have you ever gotten bad vibes from one of your children’s friends? Maybe you felt like he/she was a negative influence or was causing your son or daughter to be unhappy.  It can be hard to know when you as a parent should get involved and when it’s better to just let things be.

As a licensed therapist and a mother of four children, I am certainly familiar with this scenario, and I recently sat down with LDS Living Magazine to offer my views on it. Here are a few strategies for what to do when you don’t like your kids’ friends:

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Boost Self-Esteem to Improve Relationships: Huff Post Interview

confidence

No matter what great things we accomplish or how much confidence we build, the truth is that all of us have weaknesses and insecurities. And sometimes, unfortunately, they can get out of hand and interfere with our lives. Have you ever felt a strain on a relationship because of a nagging insecurity of yours? If so, you’re not alone. Studies have shown that the way we feel about ourselves, for good or for bad, is a critical factor in how happy we are in romantic relationships. 
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Are You Self-Aware or Self-Absorbed?: Studio 5

Are you self-aware or self-absorbed?

We each have a long list of personal responsibilities: our finances, careers, bodies, families, etc. It’s critical to be aware of our lives and our needs. But when does self-awareness become self-obsession? Do we think about ourselves too much?  Here’s how to determine if you’re self-aware or self-absorbed:

Are you usually the center of attention? Do you monopolize conversations? Are all your social media updates about yourself? If so, you may be self-absorbed. Try instead to balance the attention you give to yourself and to others. Remember that everyone needs to be recognized, celebrated, and validated.

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Uplift Families Parenting Conference with Utah’s First Lady Jeanette Herbert

Uplift Families Conference

I have the pleasure to speak at the Uplift Families Parenting Conference on September 13th. Hosted by Utah First Lady Jeanette Herbert, this exciting event will feature several prominent presenters who will help us learn to develop and celebrate meaningful child-parent relationships.  Come and be inspired as we discuss ways to uplift Utah families!  Dinner is included.

My presentation will be focused on an area that parents (especially mothers) often neglect…yep, you guessed it! I’ll be tackling the topic of self-care for parents.

Get Event Details

Purchase Tickets

Download the 2014 Uplift Families Conference E-Poster

Get info about my book The Burnout Cure: An Emotional Survival Guide for Overwhelmed Women.

Hope to see you in a few weeks at the conference!

5 Survival Strategies for Work-at-Home Moms

These days, more and more women with children are choosing to work from home.  This has many advantages:  increased flexibility, spending more time with the kids, and supplementing the family income are all attractive reasons to pursue work opportunities from home.  But there are unique challenges as well:  these women have constant interruptions and may experience difficulty concentrating with the distractions of home life.  Here are 5 survival skills for work-at-home moms:

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Stop Overreacting article Community Orange Magazine

Do you get very upset or angry easily?  Have you ever been accused of being hot-headed?  If you respond with intensity and emotion that is disproportionate to the situation at hand, you are overreacting.

I recently had an article published in the August edition of Community Orange Magazine where I discussed strategies to keep calm and appropriately respond to stressful situations.  Here are a few basic ways to keep from overreacting.

Click here to read the full article about ways to keep your cool.